The Fruit and Your Relationships: Faith

It is interesting to me that faith is considered a fruit of the Spirit. (Galatians 5:22-23 KJV) Most of the time when we hear about faith or speak about it, it is in context of something that we need to have or do or are lacking. Isn't it liberating then, to read that it is offered to us as a by-product of the Spirit in our lives; a natural result of following Christ?  In the matter of our relationships, faith is something we all benefit from.

In addition to the usual idea of faith being a conviction about our beliefs, Strong's Concordance of the Bible defines faith, as found in Galatians 5:22, as the character of one who can be relied on. I can just stop my post right there; that definition says it all. How many of the issues we face in our relationships could be averted if we were all automatically infused with that definition of faith?

 My husband Scott told me about something he'd read in Reader's Digest; a story Steven Covey had told about a business he'd been called in to consult for. Covey had taken note of the disrespect oozing from the employees in response to the manager. After finding all the processes and systems to be in place and in working order, he knew he'd have to dig deeper to find the root of the issue. If all the systems are running perfectly, where is the problem? In interviewing the employees he finally found his answer, they all knew the manager was having an affair with one of the other employees. That lack of integrity was undermining all of the systems that were otherwise perfection. Once the manager changed his ways and openly admitted and apologized for his actions, their machine began running smoothly. Problem solved.

Scott went on to share some other insights he's gleaned from Mr. Covey along the way; the root of which is, you have to build integrity and faith in yourself before those you are in relationships with can have faith in you. So, how do you do that? By making one small promise to yourself, just a tiny one even and then keeping that promise.

Scott quoted Covey as saying, "private matters always precede public ones". The understanding is, that as you begin to breed faith in yourself those closest to you will begin to believe in you. Then before you know it the general public shares that faith in you; your word becomes known as the truth.

Just like the manager in the story above, a lack of personal integrity affects our relationships. And conversely, personal integrity transfers to our public interactions. It might be difficult to grasp such a concept that is not tangible. There is not a growth chart you can fill in as your personal faith in yourself and others reaction to it evolves, but such is the elusive manner of faith.

Another aspect of faith in our relationships, aside from how we view ourselves, is how we view others. Often times you can see a direct response to that display of faith.

One illustration that comes to mind is a story my father shared with me recently about a boy who rides the school bus my dad drives. The driver who was leaving the route had told my dad how unruly and disruptive this boy was; she described their routine involving the many trips to the principal's office and such like. According to the previous driver, it was a losing situation; the kid was without hope. My dad had another idea however; he simply thought to put some faith in the boy. Dad basically said to him, "Hey, I'm new to this route and you've been riding for a while. You wanna sit up here and help me navigate the route?" The kid was instantly changed from trouble maker to helper. You see, when we have someone who believes in us, we often rise to the occasion. I know I do.

Often times we have the ability to empower someone to be who they can be, just by having faith in them. One pastor described the difficulty he and his wife were having with the behavior of their young son. They had tried everything, but wisely recognized the one thing that made the difference; they put faith in him. When they said to him, 'This is not how you want to act; you are a good boy. We are so happy to have a thoughtful and kind son like you!'  He began to live up to their expectations of him. Expectations presented as faith instead of demand. He valued their belief in him.

We are like that boy. We have One who believes in us. He has put His faith in us. He's given it to us as abundant fruit; fruit that we can bear in our lives through His Spirit. With that knowledge we are armed to rise up and be who He has called us to be. We are worthy through Him and He believed in us enough to pay the price for our redemption so we could always be with Him.

With faith like that, already put in us as we are, it doesn't matter what other people say or what they may think of us. It does not matter if anyone else has faith in us. He believes in us. The process of growing in faith is already started. What else do we need?