Don't Sweat the Small Stuff

Have you ever had a discussion with your husband that did not end the way you wanted? This happened with my husband and me several weeks ago and, taking it personally, I did not talk to him for hours.The feelings of anger and rage ate away at my spirit. I was consumed with bitterness and decided that talking about my feelings with someone was better than keeping them to myself. I called my Sunday School teacher who recounted a similar experience. She mentioned that prayer and studying God's Word was the remedy. So, after our conversation I tucked myself away in a quiet corner and prayed. Talking to God like He was sitting right next to me ushered in a soothing peace. As I poured out all my feelings to Him, the realization of how I was sweating the small stuff hit me like a brick.

The desire to have my way was more important to me than inviting peace into my marriage. The folly of sweating the small stuff clouded my ability to see the bigger picture of my relationship. My selfishness toward my husband opened the door of negative opportunity so wide, that the enemy easily entered our marriage and carried out his plan of divide and conquer.

Much like Eve experienced, the serpent manipulated the truth so that I saw only the earthly facts. The enemy successfully used me as a pawn to bring destruction and division to my marriage. After struggling for a time, my husband and I had finally reached a point in our relationship that we were genuinely enjoying our time together. Everything that the enemy meant for bad, God was turning around for good. We were at a place of "oneness".

Has your husband ever failed to respond properly to your emotions? Perhaps he forgot your request to cut the grass or address much needed repairs around the house. Do not get overworked and make the mistake of thinking that he is the bad guy. Beware: the enemy is lurking and waiting for an opportunity to steal your joy and peace.

"The enemy comes to steal kill and destroy, but Jesus came that we might have life and have it more abundantly" (John 10:10 KJV).

When your husband does not meet your expectations, just smile. God smiles when you fail, yet you happily received His abundance in mercy and grace.

"For we have all sinned and fallen short of the Word of God" (Romans 3:23).

Consider for a moment the same God who has delivered you and me. He is working on our husbands, too.

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are my ways your ways, says the Lord" (Isaiah 55:8 KJV).

As I continued to pray and read God's Word, His peace settled more comfortably into my mind. This allowed me to focus on the positive aspects of my marriage, and prompted me to refocus my thoughts. God has certainly blessed this union beyond what my husband and I could imagine.

We have not arrived, but we have certainly come a long way! Two Sundays out of the month, we watch a football game together. Even though my knowledge is limited when it comes to grown men chasing that odd-shaped ball, we bask in each others company. Just recently my husband agreed to go to the mall with me and hold my bags while I shopped. The more I re-focus, the more my private little list of "small stuff to sweat" shrinks, and I am proud to announce that my list of positive things has grown exponentially.

The Word of God on the inside of a heart, coupled with prayer will work. It did for me. When you pray, the power of God transforms the old way of thinking. If we sweat the small stuff now, it will forfeit our blessings of tomorrow. God has conditioned you and me to operate in the super natural elements of his power. You are already victorious. So walk in it.

God has certainly opened doors for us in this season of marriage. The sweetness is back. My husband and I are moving on to higher levels in God. The realization that both husbands and wives are on the potter's wheel, allows me to see when I over react. When Jesus created us He knew that we would mess up. But, his mercy intersects our punishment and grace provides forgiveness.

As long as we are in these bodies of flesh, we will have disagreements. The key is learning to agreeably disagree. Do not let the sun go down on your wrath. Do not allow your emotions to run wild; the enemy will use it as bait to bring division. Pray and talk to God about your feelings, then refocus your thoughts. Meditate on the positive things from your marriage when you hit a bump in the road. Think about your husband and how he made you smile, cooked your favorite meal, ran your bath water, or even rubbed your feet after work. Do not harp on the negative. Life is too short. Jesus came that you might have life and have it more abundantly, so don't sweat the small stuff.