Preschool Personalities
Since gaining an understanding of The Personalities I am better able to understand my husband, my friends, sales clerks, and people in general. However, understanding my children has been one of the most beneficial aspects of knowing The Personalities. My children were older when I became aquainted with personalities, but better late than never. But, today is your lucky day if you have younger children because we are going to unravel the mysteries of preschool personalities.
Although each person's personality develops more as they grow, it isn't unusual to see a child's personality creep out as early as infancy. I've had a sanguine baby bat her eyelashes at me from an infant seat perched on top of a table at a restaurant. As I've watched that little girl grow up her sanguine side is increasingly evident. Although it's not always easy to identify personalities at such a young age, I've seen children display distinct personality traits as early as 18 months to two years. The sooner we can understand our little ones, the sooner we can begin to nurture the person God created your child to be later in life.
The Sanguine Preschooler: this child is bright, lively, and loves to perform. They will dance jigs, tell jokes, or do whatever it takes to get noticed. Although it is important to feed the need these children have for attention, it isn't necessary to overindulge the sanguine child's quest for attention. When it's appropriate, give them your undivided attention and notice their accomplishments no matter how small.
Sanguine children tend to be into everything and many have the reputation of breaking things. My youngest son broke many of his big brother's toys and when things got quiet, Eric was usually into something "fun" like cutting his hair or playing with fire. A sanguine child will charm your socks off in order to avoid getting in trouble. One time when I was scolding a young Eric, he started crossing his eyes and moving his head in circles. Getting in trouble wasn't fun, but making mom laugh in the midst of it was a blast (and a nice diversion.)
The Choleric Preschooler: if you have a bossy little one trying to run your household, you're probably looking at a
choleric. Moreso than other children, a choleric will exhibit confidence and leadership abilities. When I taught preschool I had the cutest little choleric in my class. Although I never had the opportunity to put Caroline to the test, I'm confident that she couldn've run the class in my absence. If a classmate tried to run away during an excursion from the classroom, Caroline would run the tiny perpetrator down, catch 'em, and physically put him or her back in line.
Even with their limited abilities a choleric child needs to be the boss of something. Find something age appropriate your child can be put in charge of such as monitoring family seatbelt use in the car or making sure the pets always have water. This will give your mission-minded little cherib something to accomplish and a healthy outlet for their natural leadership abilities.
I'm sure most, if not all, of us have mixed ingredients in a blender. I like to make salsa and by the time the blender has worked its magic, there's no way to distinguish the original ingredients such as tomatoes, onions, and jalapenos; they are completely mixed together. Although there are personality blends, the original ingredients (traits) don't get mixed to the same extent as those put into an appliance made for mixing. The Personalities tend to stay more distinct.
people. This combination is a born leader - they mix the natural leadership skills of the choleric and the people-loving aspect and charm of the sanguine to create a modern-day Pied Piper. They can lead and motivate people. The sanguine side of this blend helps tone down the intensity of the choleric and the choleric side reigns in the lack of focus that often plagues sanguines.
Last time we met we learned the emotional needs of the sanguine and choleric personalities. Today we are going to focus on the needs of melancholy and phlegmatic people.
Sensitivity to feelings: Melancholy people are the most sensitive of all The Personalities. The emotional ups and downs in their lives often reflect extreme peaks and valleys unlike the other personalities whose emotional stages aren't as dramatic. Melancholies respond best when people are sensitive to their moods. Romans 12:15 is particularly applicable to this personality: "Rejoice with those who rejoice, and weep with those who weep." In most cases, when a melancholy is feeling blue they don't appreciate a bright-eyed, cheerleading sanguine's attempts to cheer them up; they'd rather have someone sit next to them and offer comfort.
than the other three personalities. Sanguine personalities tend to be so positive that they don't stay blue for long. Choleric people are so goal oriented they will snap themselves out of the doldrums because they have things to do and places to go. A phlegmatic person doesn't really like to deal with emotional issues, so when feelings start getting complicated they just tune them out. However, none of these strategies work for a melancholy; they are like bridge that needs pillars of support when spanning troubled waters. Let the melancholy in your life know that you care and are there for them when they need you.
Now that we have learned how to identify The Personalities, it's time to learn what to do with our knowledge. In Part One we are going to look the emotional needs of the sanguine and choleric personalities.
and their tank will quickly move from full to empty. They thrive on attention. If you have a sanguine in your life make an effort to give them plenty of attention. It isn't necessary that the world revolve around them (although they'd love that), but if they have a new dress, a new haircut, or tell a particularly funny story, pay them a simple compliment. Also, if they are talking to you, give them your undivided attention. Let them know you are interested in what they have to say by not letting your thoughts (or your body) wander off. You'll make their day by giving them your attention.
Affection/Touching: Sanguine people are touchy, feely people. They love hugs and tend to be very physical; they often invade other's personal space because of their affectionate nature. Eric, my youngest, is almost sixteen years old and still loves to sit right next to me on the couch. It's not unusual for him to snuggle close and lay his head on my shoulder. The other day he took our snuggles one step further...he threw his legs across my lap. Even thought I'm not as touchy and feely as Eric, I make sure to give him lots of love pats and return his affection when he offers it. What a blessing it is to have a sanguine son who still wants to be close to his 'ol ma.
Approval of every deed: Have you been around a child (or an adult for that matter) who is constantly looking for affirmation? Chances are you are dealing with a sanguine. "Isn't my dress pretty. Do you like my new haircut? Do you think I made the right decision?" Compliments and approval really fill a sanguine person's emotional tank. If they aren't hearing the words they desire, a sanguine has no reservations soliciting your words of affirmation. Again, it isn't necessary to overdo the compliments, but a few properly placed words of approval will put a big smile on their face.
. When it comes to appearances, Watson is easy to distinquish from the other two because he looks so different. Cooper and Newman, on the other hand, are almost identical making it difficult for people outside our family to tell them apart. However, when people look beneath the surface, Cooper and Newman's distinct personalities are unmistakable.
Playful/Popular Sanguine - the sanguine personality is affectionately known as "THE TALKER" because they are the most loquacious of all the personality types. This trait explains why they are such colorful story tellers and masters at telling jokes. These natural strengths make them the life of any party. Sanguine people usually have magnetic personalities and, in many cases, can charm the spots off of a leopard.
Powerful Cholerics - a choleric person is unmistakably "THE DOER." People born with this personality are natural leaders. They love to be in charge of anything and will rise to the occasion. They are decisive and will take control when given the opportunity. They love to work and are goal oriented. My husband is choleric and my friends marvel that I never have to make him a "honey-do" list in order to get things done around the house. Just the other night I was battling a hard water stain that had built up in our master bath toilet bowl. The next thing I knew it was gone! Warren had gotten some kind of razor and quickly eradicted the offending substance. Go Warren!
They love to shop and tend fill their shopping bags with flamboyant and eye-catching styles. They often adorn themselves with accessories such as bulky and dangly jewelry, unique shoes, and large handbags that carry everything but the kitchen sink (and they'd probably carry that too if there was enough room.) If you need an aspirin, a paper clip, or a wrench, find a sanguine.
I have an adorable college-aged niece who exudes the sanguine personality. We recently attended a funeral and she wore a black, spaghetti strap dress with a tight bodice and a puffy knee-length skirt. She accessorized with a black head peice and gold high heels. (She uses a variation of the same outfit for evening weddings.) She did, however, leave her three-foot, backpack purse at home.
The Popular/Playful SANGUINE - the word sanguine is from the Greek word meaning "blood". Sanguine personalities are so named because the early Greek thinkers thought these people had red-hot blood coursing through their veins. Sanguine people are bright and lively and tend to be fun-loving and outgoing.
just different. God knew exactly what He was doing when He made us all unique individuals. Can you imagine how dull the world would be if we were all alike?
Understanding The Personalities helps us understand each other. Ephesians 4:29 says:
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