Take Root and Write

Who would do this if I didn't?

Each Saturday I find myself doing what seems like a million jobs around my house that nobody would even notice...unless I didn't do them anymore for a while.  Then certain things would become a real mess!  It takes me at least half the day to get all these things done, some days the whole day.  But they are mostly unnoticed by anyone else, because I keep up with them and maintain the smooth running of things.   Many times on Saturdays I rush around out of breath just to get everything done and meanwhile my kids don't even realize it.  They are doing their own thing.  Why do I tell you all this?  I know you really don't care about my Saturday cleaning routine but I am headed toward making a point here so stay with me!

In the church I find myself doing many things as the partner to the pastor that go undetected by 99.9% of people.  These things are behind the scenes, extremely important things, which left unchecked would leave a real void.  Because I am doing them on a regular basis, the ship runs more smoothly.  No one would be aware of the importance of these things, unless...I did not do them anymore. 

Just as we do many things in our home in serving as wife and mother, so we do many things in the church as spiritual mother that affect the welfare of our church and it's precious people.  Many people are unaware of these things but it doesn't make the things any less important.

Sometimes it's as simple as having the knowledge of a difficult time in a person's life and dropping a note in the mail to them.  It's seeing the person over in the corner at a fellowship and taking time to notice them and give an encouraging word.  It's bending down to take a child in your arms who is crying because some other children have excluded them from their group.  It's making a phone call to someone you just have a sense needs to hear a word of life.  Sometimes it entails taking care of an administrative task for your husband that was left undone by someone else that could really affect the services the next weekend.  So, you step in and "save the day" so things will go smoothly, and no one is the wiser that something almost fell through the cracks.

Wear the coat!

Genesis 37:3 -10 “Now Jacob loved Joseph more than any of his other children because Joseph had been born to him in his old age. So one day he gave Joseph a special gift--a beautiful robe. But his brothers hated Joseph because of their father's partiality. They couldn't say a kind word to him. One night Joseph had a dream and promptly reported the details to his brothers, causing them to hate him even more. "Listen to this dream," he announced. "We were out in the field tying up bundles of grain. My bundle stood up, and then your bundles all gathered around and bowed low before it!" "So you are going to be our king, are you?" his brothers taunted. And they hated him all the more for his dream and what he had said. Then Joseph had another dream and told his brothers about it. "Listen to this dream," he said. "The sun, moon, and eleven stars bowed low before me!" This time he told his father as well as his brothers, and his father rebuked him. "What do you mean?" his father asked. "Will your mother, your brothers, and I actually come and bow before you?"

In this passage of scripture, we see that Joseph had his father’s favor, to the degree that he even gave Joseph a special gift – a beautiful robe, or as many of us have heard it described, “a coat of many colors.” Joseph subsequently had a dream of him being placed in a position of favor and authority in which his family would even bow down to him. Of course we know in reading the rest of the story that that is exactly what happened! However he faced a lot of things in order to get to that point. People were definitely less than excited about what was happening in his life. There was such jealousy involved that he was thrown in a pit and left to die, sold into slavery, and that was just the tip of the iceberg.

Just as with Joseph, I’ve seen this happen in ministry over the years. Do you want to be criticized by people? Just succeed!

I look around me and see certain ministers that are bringing millions of people into the Kingdom of God. Countless souls are being reached. Yet there are other ministers who are not so famous, who critically question, ”Yes, but are they bringing them in through the right methods?” Who cares! I don’t care if I have to stand on my head to get people to come to the saving knowledge of Jesus. I’ll do whatever it takes to bring people to Him.

I remember many years ago in our previous pastorate when things really started taking off and growing, there was a man who was very jealous over that and he actually criticized us and told people that the only reason our church was growing was because my husband was young and had a “trendy hairstyle.” Wow! If it were only THAT easy to experience church growth! My husband would change his hairstyle every week if that’s all that was involved.

Does the enemy have one up on you?

Welcome to the article for ministry wives! I’ll share an encouraging word with you here on a monthly basis…heart to heart, from someone who understands. I once heard it said that, “the ministry defies explanation to anyone outside of it.”  I agree wholeheartedly with this statement.  The other day I also saw a t-shirt that said, “Ahhhh…the ministry…” (it went on to say, “if you need an explanation you’re not in the ministry!”) When you click here each month, I promise you’ll be reading the words of a woman who understands your world.

This month I want to talk to you about your personal identity.  Many women, including ministry wives, do not understand who they are in Christ.  We are ministering from an unfair disadvantage because we have allowed the enemy a place in our life that God never intended him to have.  This is why we have so many pastor’s wives who quit and literally walk out on their husbands.  Or, in their woundedness, take a back seat that perhaps God never designed for them.  Yes, there are those who take more of a behind the scenes role, and that is perfectly fine if that is your calling.  But there are also those who really don’t belong there but have gone there because of hurt or wounds over the years.

Ladies, we must realize who God has made us to be, and that His divine will and purpose is being accomplished in us.  We must have this foundation in our lives or the enemy will have a foothold.

Many ministry wives wrestle with this question:  Am I in ministry because God chose me and wants me in this ministry, or… did I just "fall in love" with a man who happens to be a preacher? When women believe the lie that they just “happened to fall in love with a preacher” with no divine plan from God in mind, they have given the enemy a huge "one up" on them. He now has an advantage that God never intended for him to have in their lives, and rest assured, the enemy will whisper in their ear at every turn, "It's your husband who has the calling… not you.  You are just along for the ride.  You really aren’t all that important…" He hisses this in their ear and slithers away, and at this point, women who swallow this lie of the enemy begin to ride the roller coaster of depression, and despair as they fight the enemy’s constant attack on their identity and self esteem. 

Beginning to doubt a "call" and that their lives are not serving any purpose, these women begin to lose their sense of personal significance.

God chose us for this life, not man…not even “our man.”   Our identity and call is not rooted in our husband or our church.  God predestined us to be in ministry.  Read Psalm 139 again ladies, and look at it in light of your life and ministry.  Every day ordained for you was written in His book before one of them came to be!   Bill, Tom, Ed, Ron or Larry didn't choose you… GOD DID!!!!!    You are a pastor's wife because God wants you to be.

I learned years ago that I must derive my self identity and worth based on who I am in Christ, and my calling, not my husband or what my church thinks or how they treat me.  Bottom line ladies… it's a "God" thing… a "calling" thing… you can't get this from anywhere else… not your husband, not your church, not even your SELF.  You see, self identity for the Christian or woman in ministry isn't in self… it's in JESUS.  What we’re really looking for is not self esteem, but God’s esteem.  His approval.  Self acceptance and worth because of who He is and the fact that He has created us with a divine purpose.

If we do not truly grasp the fact deep down inside that we have been called and anointed by God, we will be lacking boldness and joy in the ministry that God wants us to have. 

Do you doubt your calling? Remember…   "And those he predestined he also called, those he called he also justified, those he justified, he also glorified…" Romans 8:30.